VICTIM

Wow, such a heavy heart. Sometimes life reaches crisis point...

You know, before you start reading, waiting for the funny part...
don't bother because it just isn't going to happen on this post.

Tune out now if you're depressed or want an uplifting blog read.

Sometimes we feel like there is no way out.
Like a mouse caught in a corner, with only a trap between us and the way home.

I don't know how desperate you have to be; to actually go through with it: you know suicide.

A very close friend tried to end her life today. It saddens me deeply.... I feel for her in her suffering; but I have everything to live for, my disappointment in her actions cannot be hidden. She was my best friend at one time, I would have fought for her tooth and nail. I love her...

I feel pain, but I cannot express it. I feel anger, yet I do not give in to it. I am angry with her, but I love her. She is my sister. She is a part of me... It hurts me.
Yet I love my wife and family with all of my heart and I cannot and would not abandon them. I cannot understand why her own family has abandoned her... Why Michael, why Aaron, why James, Why Phillip? Why do you deny your own mother, your own flesh, your blood, the very reason for your own existence? Have you all been twisted by his lies? Can you not see that She loves you?
In the darkness, she cries for you...
In the night, she recalls the gentle beating of your heart as you slept as a child.
I once held you in my own arms, proud to be your uncle, proud of your mother...
Proud to have known you.

But why do you abandon her? She loves you... She loves you. She is your mother. I know you love her too. Don’t let your emotions take hold of you, but don’t forget who you are! She hurts right now, but she loves you and she feels that you have abandoned her, she loves you...
You don’t want to be there at her funeral now. No parent should ever have to bury their own child. Don’t let this happen to your mother... Be there for her. She is always there for you. Please... We nearly lost a part of us. We nearly lost our sister. I am crying. I love my sister and she tried to kill herself!!!
I hate her for it. I wish that I didn’t know her so well... In fact sometimes I wish that she was not my sister... That she belonged to somebody else. I would deny that she was unhappy. She has always been unhappy. I have always known this, but I have never been able to help her.

It feels as if all I have ever been able to do is to hang around and offer comic relief for her. I am her little brother. I do love her. She is my sister, my blood, my own flesh and part of me.

A dear friend of mine has lost his sister in the same way that my sister has attempted to take her own life. It was shocking and cruel. It affected him profoundly. I don’t want this. How can I tell her that she is worth so much more? I am saddened by her actions and I love her to bits. I hope that she sees that she is worth loving and that she really is a wonderful sister that any brother would be proud of. Margery I love you. We all love you. I might not call you by your chosen name, but to me you are the sister who left me so many years ago. Your name however, has never left me and I will always know you as Margery my mentor, my idol, my big sister. Margery I love you!